Leafer Madness, Part 9

Disclaimers part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5 part 6 part 7

part 8

(TUCKER is alone and next to a small pool. He spies his own reflection and examines his collar closer.)
TUCKER: (to self) Wow, I can't believe this collar. It looks like some cheap-ass Rolex knock-off or something. I wonder if I could just cut through it and then...(TUCKER grabs his sickle and attempts to cut through the metal bands. The collar explodes, killing him)

DEATH: They explode when you try to get through, remember?

TUCKER: Oh yeah, you're right...forgot about that little bit. Wait—I get to challenge you to a game, don't I? And if I win, I get to live, right?

DEATH: (sighs) Yeah. What do you want to play?

TUCKER:I choose...Riskopoly

DEATH: Riskopoly? Is that...?

TUCKER:Yep

DEATH:So you took the two board games that take the longest to complete and combined them?

TUCKER: Well, I didn't do the combining. It's something Carlo showed to me. I can't really blame the guy for taking it up. If you get injured as much as that guy, you have to do something to fill the time. I mean, you can only do so much rehab and watch so much porn a day. You have to something to fill the hours.

DEATH: Fair enough

(THEY set up the board and play for a while)

DEATH:SO, are you enjoying the game?

TUCKER:There's a “yo momma” joke in here somewhere, but since my life is on the line and since you're Death and all, I'll let it slide this one time. (TUCKER looks at the board and sees that he is terribly losing) Say Death...

DEATH:Yes, Darcy?

TUCKER:What's that way over there (Points over DEATH'S shoulder)

DEATH:I'm not falling for that one again.

TUCKER:No, I'm serious! There's a big, scary...thing! and it's right over there!

DEATH:I'm an all present, supernatural being that will exist until the end of time. I'm NOT going to fall for that one again.

TUCKER:Well, then, I suppose it's time for Plan B! (TUCKER gets up, knees DEATH in the crotch, steps on his neck and runs like hell)

DEATH:What the...

TUCKER:Only the good die young!

DEATH: Nothing escapes me. No one escapes me.