Wednesday, September 22, 2010

An Open letter to All Leafs Fans From Mikhail Grabovski

Hellos Fannings of Leafs,

Is Mikhail Grabovski. I am knowing of crazy stuff on internet about fight I had in Vancouver. Is crazy shit talk, and I am here for settings it right.

First, in Belarus, we have been taught to never make fist with women. I am still shock at North America, where I see not only is fisting with women ok, but people charge money to watch it in Internet! In Belarus, you make fist with womans, she hits you back twice as hard! What a country!

This legal suit is especially crazy because Vancouver was nutso while Olympics. Every night, drunk peoples in streets and places, cheering, yelling, singing songs real loud. Was crazy! Was crazy night when fight break out, like 10 or 12 people all kung fu fighting. Is a little bit frightening.

But anyway, I no start fight with any stupid Habs fan. Even if they are, as we say in Belarus, a bag of douche. I could no start fight with a BROKEN WRIST. I silly talk that I start fight because not only was wrist broken, but I discover great drink called Piña Colada! Luke Schenn tell me of Garth Brooks, who is country man who sings about Piña Coladas. He is much strong fine man to sing of these:

But seriously, these piña colada thingys are like dessert you drink. Is much tasties.

As Leafs player this year, I promise you much Habs fist-beating, much puck-scoring, and many more fun pictures. For Halloween, I may don eyepatch because I look like guy in “Escape from New York” and “Escape from LA.” I no see it, but Dion Phaneuf tells me it win like 12 Oscars of explosions.

Oh well, it is time for rest and training for Mikhail. Go Leafs go!


kidkawartha said...

Just.....perfect. If you don't mind, I'll consider this my PPP birthday present.
"a bag of douche" hahahaha

Aubrey said...

It's eerie how much Grabovski sounds like the guy with the tiny giraffe on that DirecTV commercial.


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