Sunday, January 11, 2009

Maple Leafs Chat: a new Visitor

***Welcome to the official chat room of the Toronto Maple Leafs***
PoniRides4aBuck: hey guys, check out this thing Antro sents me
StajanNotCajan:oh man, is it another cat picture?
PoniRides4aBuck: no, is interwebs story. If you says “wendel clark “ 5 times into mirror, he comes and punchs in all your bloods!
ShakeNBlake: don’t you mean punch OUT your blood?
PoniRides4aBuck: whatevers is awesome
ShakeNBlake: That’s ridiculous. It’s idiotic. I AM A 40 GOAL SCORER!
StajanNotCajan:well, let’s get a rookie to test it out.
***Son_of_a_mitch has entered the chat room***
Son_of_a_mitch: ‘sup fuckers?
StajanNotCajan: hey Mitch, you got a mirror?
Son_of_a_mitch: yeah, why?
PoniRides4aBuck: Look in it and says Wendel Clark 5 times
Son_of_a_mitch: Wendel Clark 5 times
StajanNotCajan: No man, say the words “Wendel Clark” 5 different times while looking at the mirror
Son_of_a_mitch: Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark.
***Crunchin_Clark has appaeared in John Mitchell’s place***
Son_of_a_mitch: HOLY FUCK
Crunchin_clark: What the? Did you summon me? I was just about to fall asleep! What’s wrong with you?
*** Crunchin_clark has started punching out Son_of_a_mitch’s blood***
Son_of_a_mitch: AHHH!! FUCK!! OW OF FUCK I WANNA FUCKIN LIVE AHHHH!! He…he fuckin punched out all my fucking blood!! FUCK! Call ambulance
ShakeNBlake: I call bullshit
StajanNotCajan: Why would he bother to type out the screams?
StajanNotCajan: /takes out compact
StajanNotCajan: Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark
*** Crunchin_clark has appeared in StajanNotCajan’s place***
StajanNotCajan: AHHHH! OH NOES! Will you punch out all my blood?
Crunchin_clark: Oh don’t worry—I couldn’t punch you out. Punching you would be like punching a puppy. Don’t worry little guy—you just keep watching your cartoons and eating cookies.
ShakeNBlake: /takes out mirror
ShakeNBlake: Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark
***Crunchin_clark has left StajanNotCajan’s place and appeared at ShakeNBlake***
StajanNotCajan: Where did Wendel go? Why are my pants….? Oh dammit, did I wet myself in front of Wendel Clark?
Crunchin_clark: Why does this keep happening to me?
Crunchin_clark: /starts punching ShakeNBlake
ShakeNBlake:AHHH! OOOOWWWWWOOWWWOOWOWOWOWOW!! OH GODS! Ah…he…HE PUNCHED ALL MY CANCER OUT! I AM A 40 GOAL SCORER! I still need an ambulance…
***Welcome to Patrick Roy’s lair somewhere in the wilderness of Quebec***
King_wa: hokay, time to checkay les emails…penis enlargements, delete…."you want to makes your partner tremble?”, delete…what’s dis?” Say Wendel Clark 5 times and he comes and punches out all your blood”? Tout le sang? Bullshit
King_wa:/takes out mirror
King_wa: Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark, Wendel Clark
*** Crunchin_clark has appeared in king_wa’s Quebec lair***
Crunchin_clark: GODDAM INTERNET!
Crunchin_clark:/ punches out king_wa’s blood
King_wa: WENDEL CLARK A PUNCHÉ TOUT MON SANG!

2 Comments:

Navin Vaswani (@eyebleaf) said...

I'm beginning to grow very fond of Son_of_a_Mitch. He seems like a douchebag, but in that fun sort of way.

kevincrumbs said...

Man, I really, really love this blog.

 

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