Thursday, January 24, 2008

JFJ Post-firing suicide watch, day 3

(SCENE: JFJ is once again in his office.)

JFJ: Aw, screw it all. I'm through. Finished, I tells ya! FINISHED! What I need is pills and booze, yeah, pills and booze!
(Takes out what appears to be a bottle of Jack Daniels and a baggie of small pill-like, um, things. He swallows most of the contents of the baggie and starts chugging the contents of the bottle. AIDE enters.)

AIDE:Sir, what are you doing?
JFJ:I'm ending it, Skipper, or whatever your name is. This time, it's pills and booze--nice and painless way to go.
AIDE:But sir...this bag is full of Tic-Tacs. And your bottle of Jack (sniffs bottle) seems to be filled with iced tea.
JFJ:You mean I'm not over dosing on pills and booze?
AIDE: No, sir
JFJ:And you can't commit suicide with Tic-Tacs and iced tea?
AIDE:I'm afraid not, sir
JFJ:Really? Shit!

2 Comments:

Jaredoflondon said...

Next, JFJ tries to shoot himself in the head with a water pistol filled with iced tea.
his last words were "mmm delicious"

Anonymous said...

Naw, he lays on the tracks in front of a toy train.

This game is fun

 

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