Tuesday, January 22, 2008

JFJ Post-Firing Suicide Watch: Day 1

Dammit, I should have been doing this sooner...

SCENE: JFJ's office. An AIDE enters to find JFJ dangling from the ceiling with a rope tied like a noose around his feet.)

AIDE:Mr. Ferguson, what are you doing?
JFJ: I'm trying to hang myself. I've got nothing to live for.
AIDE:But sir...if you're hanging yourself, isn't the rope supposed to be tied around your neck?JFJ: I tried it that way, but I couldn't breathe, so I tied it around my ankles.

Thank you! I'll be here all week!


Jaredoflondon said...

literal spit take. I applaud you.

Senators Lost Cojones said...

Jesus woman, you just cost me a mouthful of a very nice Riesling. Well played.

"Marge, you know that batting this light bulb is the only thing that makes me feel better after giving away those million dollar greyhounds!"

Kirsten said...

Is it bad that I find the whole Leafs situation to be beyond hilarious?

Loser Domi said...

@senators lost cojones: sorry about that. I make it up to you in bottle rockets* (since we're quoting The Simpsons here)Glad to see you liked it, reaching across the aisle and all.

*not really

@kirsten: Well, I suppose many Leafs fans themselves (the ones who aren't on hold calling the suicide prevention hot lines) are having a chuckle. As they say over at Four Habs Fans, "there's no English word for schadenfreude except "Leafs""

HabsFan29 said...

the term "LOL" has lost all meaning these days, but seriously, LOL.

and I love that a stupid blog Tag i wrote is catching on! thx!

Loser Domi said...

@29: you mean the schaudenfreude one? It just sums up our situation perfectly.


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