Maple Leafs Chat: Tuckered Out

BaadMuthaTucker: You know, I think it’s good for me to retire. Since I have the time, maybe I should make some amends with certain people…
***BaadMuthaTucker is calling PecaPickledPeppers!***
PecaPickledPeppers: Hello?
BaadMuthaTucker: Hey Mike, it’s…it’s Darcy. How’s it going?
PecaPickledPeppers:…Who?
BaadMuthaTucker: Darcy Tucker. We played on the Leafs a bit before you got injured again? I meant to hang out with you more, but then you got injured and we left for other teams, so I kind of lost contact.
PecaPickledPeppers: Uh, yeah…sure.
BaadMuthaTucker: Anyway, I figure since I’m retired now, I can finally bury some hatchets.
PecaPickledPeppers: wait, you’re retiring?
BaadMuthaTucker: Yeah, I figured it was about time. My back and knees and such couldn’t keep me going the way I wanted to.
PecaPickledPeppers:…
PecaPickledPeppers YOU’RE complaining to ME about knees?
BaadMuthaTucker: Oh right, sorry. That was in bad tastes. So, uh…what are you doing now?
PecaPickledPeppers: I’m in broadcasting now. It’s OK. It’s a lot of work to do, but it’s exciting, I guess.
BaadMuthaTucker: Oh, neat! How is that going?
PecaPickledPeppers: The hardest part is only living on an apple, some rice, and unlimited black coffee a day.
BaadMuthaTucker: Why are you doing that? I’m pretty sure that’s anorexia, Mike.
PecaPickledPeppers: I gotta stay sharp for the camera. Did you know I weigh 125 pounds? God, I’m such a Fatty Fatkins McFatass.
BaadMuthaTucker: Holy shit, Mike. I’m not a doctor, but I’m really, really sure you need some sort of help for that. Are you sure you don’t want to play golf or something, just to talk?
PecaPickledPeppers: Listen, I uh, have to go. I think I broke my wrist…again. Talk to you soon?
BaadMuthaTucker: Any time you need to talk, Mike, I’m here.
PecaPickledPeppers: /hangs up
***BaadMuthaTucker is calling Tie_Fighter!***
BaadMuthaTucker: Tie! It’s Darcy! How’s it going?
Tie_Fighter: It’s fine, Darc. I’m keeping busy on Battle of the Blades and such.
BaadMuthaTucker: Is that the ice skating show like Dancing with the Stars?
Tie_Fighter: Pretty much. I’m kicking ass and taking names.
BaadMuthaTucker: Yeah, that sounds like the Tie I know! You want to go golfing or something?
Tie_Fighter: I dunno, I’m pretty busy…I guess I’ll have to do a raincheck.
BaadMuthaTucker: Nah, it’s ok. See you later!
Tie_Fighter: /hangs up
***BaadMuthaTucker is calling AveryGoodTime!***
AveryGoodTime: Hello?
BaadMuthaTucker: You’re a little shithead.
BaadMuthaTucker: /hangs up
BaadMuthaTucker: Man, that never gets old.