By now you've all probably read my season preview of the Maple Leafs on either MYFO or The Bleacher Report In order to write it I had one of the three following videos playing almost anytime I was at a computer for at least a week. I really recommend having the audio of some variant of Bohemian Rhapsody playing while reading what I wrote. It really adds to the experience.
Clip one: The real Bohemian Rhapsody. I'm pretty sure that grinding noise you hear is Freddie Mercury rolling over in his grave:
Clip Two: The very Excellent Brohemian Rahpsody:
Clip three: The Zero Wing Rhapsody . Sorry for the link but I took the actual home for it on Newgrounds (instead of the stolen YouTube Version.)
OH yeah, the lyrics:
Is this the season?
Is this it finally?
Who am I kidding, No escape from reality…
I cannot lie, Leafs fans will cry, you see
I’m just a Leafs fan, I need no sympathy
Because it’s “the Leafs suck!” “no, they blow!”
Cutting grass and golfing jokes
Any way the ref goes doesn’t really matter to me, to me
Sundin won’t wear the C
But just might if we find he finally makes up his mind
Stocked up on mid grade D-men
Will they self assemble just like Voltron?
Prob’leeee nooo-ooo-oot
Barring strange new miracles
The Leafs D-squad is mostly made of cardboard
Tape him up, trainer guy
Job security for the win
PK for shutting down
Keeps us asking all the time
“What the hell is with these lines?”
Lacking such a presence of big bodies
A boarding call is not a pillow fight
Maplllllle Lee-ee-eeafs,(any way the ref goes) driving me to drink
I won’t have a liver by the time you win the Cup!
(Awesome guitar solo. Go ahead and rock out, I’ll wait.) [RD Note: Thanks--air guitar time!]
I see a team of basement cleaners for the year
That’s OK! I don’t care! It gets better soon right?
Lose to Kings and Lightning, Stajan’s really fighting WHAA??
What the Hell? (What the Hell?)What the Hell? (What the Hell?) What the Hell is going on?
Is that CuJo? AT least he’s not Raycroft, and he was pretty cheap
At least it’s not Raycroft wearing the Maple Leaf, he’ll get another chance if he comes back for cheap
The Leafs suck, no they blow, your mom’s still a ho
Un’ca Cliff making such great trades (He did not!)
Un’ca Cliff making such great trades (He did not!)
Un’ca Cliff making such great trades (He did not!)
making such great trades (He did not!)
making such great trades (He did not!) ah,
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
Oh not again, not again! (not another easy goal)
The Maple Leafs just got shutout by Florida, Flor’da FLORIDA!!
(Commence head banging!)
Who’s the real owner here? Is there some evil plot?
“why should we have a good team when we can just suck?”
Bullllllshiiiit. Who would ever believe that?
Just gotta get a flask, some reasons I drink booze right here
(more awesome solo skills)
Ooooooooooh oooooh Go Leafs, go Leafs
Nothing really matters, anyone can see
We’re tumbling for Tavares
Nothing really matters, go Leafs
Any way the ref goes…
Is this it finally?
Who am I kidding, No escape from reality…
I cannot lie, Leafs fans will cry, you see
I’m just a Leafs fan, I need no sympathy
Because it’s “the Leafs suck!” “no, they blow!”
Cutting grass and golfing jokes
Any way the ref goes doesn’t really matter to me, to me
Sundin won’t wear the C
But just might if we find he finally makes up his mind
Stocked up on mid grade D-men
Will they self assemble just like Voltron?
Prob’leeee nooo-ooo-oot
Barring strange new miracles
The Leafs D-squad is mostly made of cardboard
Tape him up, trainer guy
Job security for the win
PK for shutting down
Keeps us asking all the time
“What the hell is with these lines?”
Lacking such a presence of big bodies
A boarding call is not a pillow fight
Maplllllle Lee-ee-eeafs,(any way the ref goes) driving me to drink
I won’t have a liver by the time you win the Cup!
(Awesome guitar solo. Go ahead and rock out, I’ll wait.) [RD Note: Thanks--air guitar time!]
I see a team of basement cleaners for the year
That’s OK! I don’t care! It gets better soon right?
Lose to Kings and Lightning, Stajan’s really fighting WHAA??
What the Hell? (What the Hell?)What the Hell? (What the Hell?) What the Hell is going on?
Is that CuJo? AT least he’s not Raycroft, and he was pretty cheap
At least it’s not Raycroft wearing the Maple Leaf, he’ll get another chance if he comes back for cheap
The Leafs suck, no they blow, your mom’s still a ho
Un’ca Cliff making such great trades (He did not!)
Un’ca Cliff making such great trades (He did not!)
Un’ca Cliff making such great trades (He did not!)
making such great trades (He did not!)
making such great trades (He did not!) ah,
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
Oh not again, not again! (not another easy goal)
The Maple Leafs just got shutout by Florida, Flor’da FLORIDA!!
(Commence head banging!)
Who’s the real owner here? Is there some evil plot?
“why should we have a good team when we can just suck?”
Bullllllshiiiit. Who would ever believe that?
Just gotta get a flask, some reasons I drink booze right here
(more awesome solo skills)
Ooooooooooh oooooh Go Leafs, go Leafs
Nothing really matters, anyone can see
We’re tumbling for Tavares
Nothing really matters, go Leafs
Any way the ref goes…
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